Day 52 -- Practice

Byron was in charge today. He's great. When he walked in, he said, "You know what they say about small classes: they're quick, easy, and painless."

We all laughed.

Painless? No. Right from the start, my balance wasn't great. I had some good moments, but I found myself getting frustrated.

Byron must have been reading my mind, because then he said, "Remember: this isn't a yoga performance. This is a yoga practice."

And somehow, once I felt I had permission not to be perfect (not that I was even close), things got easier.

Thank heaven for intuitive teachers.

Day 13 -- The Bubble

This morning, class was nearly over; we were all in final savasana. Brook was encouraging us to stay in that posture for as long as we could--one, two, five minutes.

"You've worked hard for this," she said. "Use the focus and purpose and calm you've gained over the past ninety minutes to go out into the world and be a little kinder, a little more patient, a little more generous. You've earned it, so use it."

And I started to cry.

Two weeks into my challenge, I've felt a little tired (okay, a lot tired) and have questioned somewhat whether I can really afford this--so much time devoted to yoga, when I have so many other things going on. My writing. My kids. My husband. My teaching. Household management. SO many other demands. 

I guess I'd been seeking a sign that the Bikram yoga, and the challenge in particular, was the right way for me to be spending my time. 

And then Brook's words fell over me like a gentle rain, and a little emotional bubble burst somewhere in my chest, and tears mingled with the sweat running down my face, and I knew. 

I was in the right place. I'm doing the right thing. All is well. I'll go forward.