Day 59 -- Hold On For One More Day

I'm not gonna lie: I'm tired. I'm looking forward to my regular practice, which will be 4-5 days per week instead of 7.

But I've made SO MUCH progress during the Sixty-Day Challenge. I'll do measurements and weight and stuff tomorrow (TOMORROW!), but here are some things I've noticed:

• I'm way better at delayed gratification. I drink less water during class, and I don't bother wiping my sweat away anymore. I can deal with a dry throat and a wet face/neck/everything through the poses; I can ignore them and focus on the work I'm doing. 
• I'm far more calm during class. No more panic or anxiety. I really do get lost in the rhythm of it and am often surprised when we get to the final breathing exercise, because I realize we're done. 
• I can stay still. When I started, I'd fidget with my hair and shirt between every set. I'd scratch my nose, wipe my forehead, etc. Now I just stand there (or lie there) and breathe, for the most part. 
• I'm stronger. I can lift higher in Cobra and farther back in Camel, for example. And I don't want to shoot myself or the teacher as I approach muscle failure in Half Moon. 
• I have better balance. Yes, I still fall out of Standing Bow on a regular basis, but I can hold the posture for much longer and with much better form. 
• I'm far more calm out of class. Traffic bothers me less. My kids' issues don't get me as wound up. I'm less obsessive about...everything. "Oh, well," I say to myself. "Let it go."
• My mind is clearer. I'm less foggy, less depressed, less vulnerable to downward mood spirals. 
• I'm better at savoring every moment and being present. This is probably my favorite change.

At the end of class today, Byron gave the usual exhortation: "Practice this yoga five to six times a week, and it'll change your life. Try it for two months and see if we're right."

I definitely agree.

Day 10 -- Wipe the Sweat

My good friend Carmen, one of the world's best narrators, tells a hilarious story about a bra fitting at the renowned Orchard Corset on Manhattan's Lower East Side. I won't go into the details, but the punch line is "Wipe the sweat," said in a heavy Eastern European accent. Vipe the sveat.

I think of that line often when I'm in Bikram yoga class. I've never sweated so much in my entire life; in fact up until now, I've avoided sweating whenever possible. I prefer to walk Moneypenny in the early morning, when it's quite cool. I sleep with the windows open in the winter time. I. Don't. Like. The heat.

Except now, I find myself looking forward to it. This morning I was dog tired and pretty down, and the ten minutes I had on my mat, lying in the heat and meditating before class even started, were already restorative. As sweat poured out of me through the postures, I visualized my bad mood oozing out with it.

And now? I feel better. Still tired, but calmer and brighter. I'll go back to class tomorrow and keep sweating out the moods and the stress, the worry and the cares. And it'll all get wiped away.